Florence was never the
same in the days following Ben’s funeral. Her smile that was usually such a joy to behold, the smile that would light up the darkest room, had
disappeared. Charmaine always told her that when she smiled her eyes also
smiled, but Florence lost her joy when Ben died. She was trying very hard, for Charmaine’s sake, to give an
appearance of happiness but her heart was not in it. Her heart
was broken, she missed Ben so much. He was not just her husband, he was her only friend and she had no one else to share her daily happenings with. Ben always told her that she needed female friends and she would always respond that she didn't need any because all the women she met talked too much and only wanted to know her personal business. Florence went about her daily chores as if
she was in a fog and poor little Charmaine was being neglected. Not only was Charmaine being neglected, Florence was also neglecting her own self! She stopped going to church and made no effort to look her best. Stanley
Wharbucks did not like what was happening so he decided to keep Charmaine up at the Main House permanently. He hired Miss
Markhums, a retired Schoolteacher who was also a member of his church, to be her
Governess/Nanny. Being home schooled meant no more riding in that big fancy car
for Charmaine and no more seeing her friends at school. Charmaine was not amused! After the first two weeks at home Charmaine rebelled and
refused to come out of her room. Stanley Wharbucks sent for Florence and after
some discussions amongst themselves it was decided that
Charmaine would attend the school in town two days per week, on Mondays and
on Fridays. Charmaine was overjoyed at this arrangement and promised never to
misbehave again. Miss Markhums was very strict and Charmaine did not like her, not
because she was strict, but because everything that Charmaine did wrong was
reported by her to Stanley Wharbucks. She also tried to choose the clothes that Charmaine should wear while she was in class but Stanley Wharbucks quickly put a stop to that idea! Every free moment Charmaine had she made sure to spend it with
Florence to the chagrin of Miss Markhums who, because she was secretly in love
with Stanley Wharbucks from the day she met him forty years ago, wanted to win Charmaine’s
affection as a means of getting closer to him.
Charmaine, in trying to cheer up Florence, would laughingly tell her about all Miss
Markhums’s efforts to get her Grandfather’s attention, but Florence seemed
disinterested and would merely look at her as she spoke. After a while
Charmaine gave up talking to her and would just sit quietly until it was time for her to return to
the Main House. Charmaine would rather sit quietly
with Florence than sit and listen to the incessant chatter of Miss Markhums about
how grateful she should be that she had a Grandfather like Stanley Wharbucks. I
turned the page to read the final page of the ledger and had to take off my
glasses, rub my eyes, put them back on and looked at the date on the page again. There seemed to be
some discrepancy with the dates on the previous pages and the date on this last page. I slapped my legs! I
could not believe it! Florence had not written in her ledger for almost six years!
She said (at the top of the page) that she had lost her desire to write in the
months following Ben’s death and if it weren’t for the promises that she had
made to Charmaine’s father, Charles, she would have left the estate, which held
so many memories of Ben everywhere she turned, long ago. She was also of the opinion that
Charles would return for Charmaine one day and she wanted to be there when he
came to the estate. Six years! I pictured little Charmaine going by Florence every day to sit in silence. I shook my head. Florence had written this final page when she realized, the day before
Charmaine’s twelfth birthday, that Charmaine was ‘becoming a woman’. Charmaine was sitting in Ben’s garden reading
a book when she suddenly jumped up and rushed into the house to Florence who was setting the table for dinner. “Mawmaw!!! Mawmaw!!!” screamed Charmaine. “What’s the matter
with you child?” asked Florence, holding the left side of her chest. “I am dying Mawmaw!
I’m bleeding just like the pig they slaughtered yesterday! I am dying!” , cried Charmaine. “Where?” asked
Florence. “I don’t see any blood.” Charmaine turned around and pointed
downward, “Down here Mawmaw, look!” Florence started laughing. “It’s not funny
Mawmaw, I am dying and you are laughing!”, said Charmaine. Florence hugged Charmaine and said, “No my
child, you are not dying, this is something that happens to all women.” “But
it’s not happening to you or Miss Markhums! Why me?” Florence laughed so hard
she had to hold her sides. “Miss Markhums and I are now too old for that! Thank
God! Come, let’s go get you cleaned up and I’ll explain everything to you. I was laughing so hard and loud that I am certain my neighbours heard me and were wondering what was happening. My goodness! I laughed so hard that tears filled my eyes. Charmaine's time when she 'became a woman' brought back memories of the time when I too 'became a woman' . I dried my eyes and resumed reading.
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